Saturday, January 17, 2004
Sometimes: Excerpts from the Mind of a Madman
Sometimes I lose all hope, knowing my dreams are set way too high for a chump like me to ever aspire to. Actually, that's not true. It happens most times. I guess the fact that I haven't seen the sun for days just emphasizes it so much more. I want to feel the warmth on my skin and not have to wear that fucking jacket all day long.
I need to start picking a lot better friends. I know less than five people that I could even think of calling my best friends. And when I tell people my problems with this, they say "Find better friends." It's not that easy when these people are leeching off of me. It's not that easy when I don't know anyone else. It's not easy when I go to a school where these guys are the cream of the crop. Guess I'll have to stick with them for now. Oh well. Old habits die hard.
I've been having a lot of regrets about past decisions. I want to make things right. Nothing was supposed to be this way, but everyone abandons me. Fucking world should die. I want to fix it. I need to build a time machine. Or a really big bomb.
I can't wait until I get that car. Once I get it I'm out of here no second chances for anyone. I'll get in touch with you if I want to talk to you. And it'd be highly unlikely because why would I want to go through all the stuff that you people have done to me.
"I just want to see some palm trees."
"But to me coming from you, friend is a four letter word."
"I remember when we spoke back then. I was cold and insincere."
"He was out on the run knowing he could get by."
Sometimes I lose all hope, knowing my dreams are set way too high for a chump like me to ever aspire to. Actually, that's not true. It happens most times. I guess the fact that I haven't seen the sun for days just emphasizes it so much more. I want to feel the warmth on my skin and not have to wear that fucking jacket all day long.
I need to start picking a lot better friends. I know less than five people that I could even think of calling my best friends. And when I tell people my problems with this, they say "Find better friends." It's not that easy when these people are leeching off of me. It's not that easy when I don't know anyone else. It's not easy when I go to a school where these guys are the cream of the crop. Guess I'll have to stick with them for now. Oh well. Old habits die hard.
I've been having a lot of regrets about past decisions. I want to make things right. Nothing was supposed to be this way, but everyone abandons me. Fucking world should die. I want to fix it. I need to build a time machine. Or a really big bomb.
I can't wait until I get that car. Once I get it I'm out of here no second chances for anyone. I'll get in touch with you if I want to talk to you. And it'd be highly unlikely because why would I want to go through all the stuff that you people have done to me.
"I just want to see some palm trees."
"But to me coming from you, friend is a four letter word."
"I remember when we spoke back then. I was cold and insincere."
"He was out on the run knowing he could get by."
// posted by Unknown @ 3:52 PM 
